Interracial Dating At Wheaton College

With only a small amount of students of color here at Wheaton the dating scene is very limited for Black, Latino, or Asian students who choose to date only within their race. Interracial dating does take place here at Wheaton and there are a few couples who are committed to one another and open about their relationship, but there are some people who “hook-up” or have sex with someone of another race because they want to “try something new”. When you choose to become involved with someone, whether exclusively or casually, there is most often a physical attraction to that person. The next factor is getting to know their personality and the enjoyment of spending time with them. Unfortunately, here at Wheaton this is not always the case. I interviewed my friend Jen who is a senior here at Wheaton and this is what she had to say said about interracial dating here at Wheaton,

“In terms of interracial dating and oftentimes at Wheaton I find myself questioning the authenticity of some of these relationships… The idea of interracial dating may also be eroticized by some for who it may not be a possibility-and this is where issues may arise. It is in this eroticized fantasy where the validity of interracial relationships is questioned and often time people may disagree with these relationships.”

Jen indentifies as Costa Rican and has been involved in interracial relationships both exclusively and casually at Wheaton and in her hometown of Brooklyn, New York. She is an advocate for interracial dating. Her only issue with interracial dating here at Wheaton involves the dating of White females and Black males. She believes that some of the White girls who become involved with Black males and vice versa do so not because of attraction to the other’s personality, but because they want to know what it is like to date someone of that race or just be able to say that they did.

My conversation with Jen made me aware of other reasons people disagree with interracial dating, specifically interracial dating here at Wheaton. Is this opinion shared only with students of color? Or do white students also agree with Jen’s notion of authenticity? I am not sure but I will find out how other members of the Wheaton community feel about interracial dating.

Acceptance Having an Affect on Choices

“My parents would never accept me bringing someone of another race home… I’m just not attracted to girls/guys outside of my race… I don’t date outside of my race because I’m sure we won’t have anything in common since we come from different cultures… I am afraid people will stare at me if I was on a date with someone of another race… My children can have friends of another race, but I would prefer if they dated within our race or ethnic background”…These are just some of the reasons that people I have met choose not to date outside of their race. All of these reasons are valid in their own right, but the three issues I have with these responses to interracial dating are the discrimination against dating someone who looks physically different then you, allowing those who disapprove of interracial dating to sway your choice to date outside your race, and denying your attraction for someone because they come from a different culture.

Is it limited or no exposure to interracial dating that causes people to be in opposition to interracial dating? Or is it fear of ones relationship not being accepted by family and friends that ultimately affects the choice to not date outside of ones own race? I believe that majority of people who have had little to no exposure to interracial dating live in suburban areas, where everyone in that community is of the same race and social class. Although there are communities in urban areas that are divided by race, religion, and social class, it is nearly impossible to avoid the mixing of races in schools, work environments, and public places in general. Since there is more interaction with people of other races, if interracial dating occurs I believe there is a greater chance of acceptance from peers and family.

What do you think?